Have I grown up?
Sunday, March 13, 2011 @ 12:31 AM

Have I grown up? I find myself hard to cope with my changes since 13 years old. During secondary school, it's tough. People were weird, people were telling me about gangsters, coloured hair and coloured socks, and arcade. I could not find a balance point throughout my secondary school life.

Finally secondary school horrible life is over, a new life started. I worked for a year. Working seems a lot better than school. Talking with the working adults is just very different from talking to silly teenagers.

I worked hard so that I could get into Design school, or something that interest me, not IT or engineering courses.

Poly started, I carried the same attitude into the school. I was still as hot-tempered. I over-protected my friends, I showed my emotions on my face, anything that displeased me will just make me feel exploded.

Year 1 was like this. Year 2, worse, I had to face the very bad and big change of my life because of family issue. Now I am year 3, have I changed?

I don't know why I don't get agitated easily like last time. I don't go to the person that displease me when I am angry. When my friend told me how badly she was treated by someone I know, I don't have the fire in me to make me blow up and want to confront the fellow who bullied my friend. Somehow I told myself it is because I am too old to get angry like last time. I care for everything last time, everything around me, if I get very very very very million times annoyed I will just blow up. But now I totally bo chap, is like, a minor thing is a minor thing, as long as it does not kill anyone, I won't feel the boil. My boiling point is not as low as last time anymore.

It is a good thing. Because I don't make everything my concern anymore, I feel more easy as a human, easier to breathe and laugh more naturally. Tense up, still happens when stress comes. I still worry a lot, but I worry for things that are more important. Is it because life in school sucks, so the change in me? Or is it because I am too old to be angry?

I used to say I won't get annoyed by morons. Ya right, I was still very annoyed but I tried to hod back.

But now is really really really not annoyed by morons anymore. Well, that's why they are called morons right? I have better things to do, more productive things to do.

Have I grown up? My 22 year old thought.